Alter Ego: Gay Darfura

Pupunta ako sa Sudan sa sabado. Marami na akong nabasa tungkol sa Darfur crisis.

Gubyerno ang may pakana ng miting na to kahit pa student union nila ang nag-imbita. So sa buong limang araw na andun ako, dapat careful - in the way the late Inday Badiday knows best!

Paano kaya ako aatak sa mga rekasyunaryong aprikanong ito without subjecting myself to possible great physical harm, like the infamed waga-waga? How will I be able to push them to the corner successfully without earning a scratch or a bruise on my arm, face or ass?

I guess it is time for my alter ego to start the work for me. Laddies and gentlecreatures of the world, I introduce to you:

GAY DARFURA, Gay Dar Personified sa Sudan.

Tanong ko lang: ano ang powers nya?

God Hates the World

Ito ang title ng pinakabagong kanta ng isang anti-gay religious group, cult, cabal sa US. Homophobic, unpleasant, offensive.

And they had the gall to make a video out of it. Ilang araw ko lang tong ipo-post dito at baka maging popular pa ang mga bigots na to!

chicken

chicken ang dapat magiging karelasyon ko.

dapat, kasi naudlot. dapat, kasi hindi na mangyayari.

chicken ang unang lumapit sa akin. nagsex na kami sa unang instance ng aming pagkikita. kung isa nga syang chicken, mahaba't matalas ang kanyang tari kahit fayatolla kumeinih ang mokong. magtatagumpay sya sa sabong!

naging maligaya kami sa patuka-tuka sa gitna ng daan, pagkain sa ilang restaurants sa kowloon side, holding hands habang naglalakad papuntang bus station.

pero short-lived lang to. gusto nyang maging kami na. at ang ibig sabihin ng kami na - sa kanila na ako simulang matutulog. bente-ocho na ang kelot pero gustong me hotdog na kasama. anong moda namin, hotsilog sa umaga?

sabi ko, a la maria clara after studying in cambridge university, it tikes time. hindi pa ako handa. prens muna kami. prens with benefits.

ang siste, naging depressed chicken. hindi raw sya makatulog. malungkot sya. wala na raw meaning ang mundo. wala nang kabuluhang mabuhay.

nalorka ako. i am not about to become a doting mother. i've learned to love chicken pero ayoko ng emotionally exhausting na relasyon.

ngayon moda namin ang relasyong alexis at annie ng shaider. me time and space warp mode. in other words, cool off kahit hindi pa kami.

weird. cheaply mystical. at dahil dyan, ito ang song ko sa araw na ito:

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!

me bago akong blog (very political, i'm tells you) and i am having a very hard time.

how and why do html and blogging come at a time when you're 32 and you are way past your college years when you didn't learn a thing about computers and you are not at all very much acquainted with the wariwarung world of the web?

i need help. seriously.

PAANO BA GINAGAWA YUNG "READ MORE" chuva na yan sa blog?

naghanap ako sa help.blogger.com and there it was. pero naman, nasaan ba yang style sheet chenes na yan at paano ko ilalagay yung whatever html paragraph they say i need to put?

i got the last two. the second one, i have no idea.

can anyone help me?

Paul Potts

Woke up this morning drowsy, down and low. Walked through the wet, sad sidewalk to the gloomy office. The air-conditioning unit gave me the cold shoulder and I never felt so much worse.

Until I heard him, the mobile salesman from South Wales who joined the UK TV show Britain's Got Talent and sang Nessun dorma.

I watched him and I was breathless. I was moved to tears and I just let them flow. I never felt so much better.

I watched him again and again. I listened to him over and over. And I just couldn't get enough.

WORLD, let us all take in PAUL POTTS!

When is the Church NOT Right Anymore?

The Catholic Church is reverting back to its ultra-conservative-almost-to-the-point-of-reactionary shell. Or so it seems.




With a doctrine from the Vatican stating that not one Catholic church or ministry would involve itself in the political arena, the conservatives are winning the war against critical thinking and action.




Catholic conservatism spreads like wildfire and infects every single person, in a top-down fashion. It is still a feudal-patriarchal relationship hence making the decision or point of view of the older and/or the man far more important than any other. Blind obedience is at its strongest.




Homosexuality, upto this day, remains a sin. And homosexuals, naturally, sinners.




And now, it is a bit too much then to see the church once again wracking the headlines with its withdrawal of support on Amnesty International for allegedly supporting abortion. I read in the same article that the said church also withdrew support on UNICEF in 1996 for the same reason.




Such reasoning the church gave for such a move was simply unthinkable. It's like they're telling the rape victim, "You got raped, you got pregnant. Deal with it! And you, UNICEF, Amnesty International, you are not deserving!"




It reminded me so vividly of the reality-based movie Magdalene Sisters, a graphic portrayal of young women "sinners" forced into a convent, made to endure hard labor and public humiliation.




Their only sin? Nothing. One was sexually harassed by a cousin. The other endured teenage pregnancy. One was simply beautiful.




There was one scene in the movie where a mentally challenged nun was giving the priest a head. According to the movie itself, the last Magdalene convent was closed in 1996.




Such hypocrisy of the church is just too much to bear.




They wouldn't allow freedom of choice for the assaulted and raped, the exploited, the minority. Yet they wouldn't talk about or confront the exploitation they inflict on other people.




While I still believe in religion and the right to practice it, I wouldn't let this go away just that.




The dogmatic following of the word is simply unacceptable. I know debates on religion would go on end without resolution.




But if this seeming atrocity is left unchallenged, let us all expect another inquisition, another long round of torture.




(click title for the news article.)

The Gay Bomb

Offensive and laughable at the same time.

That's what the gay leaders in California said about the gay bomb the Pentagon has admitted to concocting one time.

The gay bomb, said the Pentagon, was meant to be a non-lethal weapon that would turn enemy soldiers into homosexuals prefering to have sex more with their fellow soldiers rather than fight.

Eh paano nga kaya kung nagkatotoo yan? Nagawa nila ang gay bomb and launched it fatale style sa lahat ng may mga enemy soldiers?

Ito ang teorya ko:

Unang lalabas ang lola nating lahat. After the explosion, lalabas ang Diana, but instead of a black frizzy hair with a matching black glittery gown, she'll cum out in soldier's boxers, boots and singlet while singing the song, "Iiiii'm Cumming Out!"

Lalabas susunod ang Wentworth, who, after realizing dinosaurs don't have a penis, went straight to prison for a taste of some real good explosions.

And the soldiers would be left with nothing but themselves: "Paano na tayo, bakla?"

Seriously, Pentagon, did you actually think that? Think Alexander the Great. He fucked while fucking the world.

heinous

i just want to share with you the frustration i felt this morning.

the asian human rights commission (ahrc) joined father robert reyes, known to many in the philippines as the running priest, in a short peaceful rally at the consulate, 14/f of the united centre, this morning.

fr. robert was campaigning for the immediate release of the abadilla 5, referring to the five suspected killers of gen. abadilla. in the court hearings, the abadilla 5 have stated their innocence. they likewise stated that they were tortured and forced into admitting the crime.

i, with some filipinos, joined the small picket. knowing fr. robert from the oust erap campaign, i was happy to see him again. i even helped him scribble "five innocent lives, 11 years" on a colored cardboard that he attached to the 5 white and 11 red carnations he was to give to the consul-general.

when we arrived on the 14th floor, both the gate and the smoked-glass door were closed, as expected. aside from us protesters, composed of a few filipinos and the staff of the ahrc and fr. robert, there were only the three building security personnel.

during the short program that ensued in the lobby, i noticed that the security was not allowing some of the filipinos coming to the consulate to get in. i asked the security what he was doing and he told me that the consulate told him that they will stop their operation for 30 minutes and that noone will be allowed to come in or go out of the consulate's premises. "new policy", i remember him telling me.

a colleague of mine went near the closed gate and was trying to listen to what was happening at the other side. may commotion daw. some people wanted to leave the premises but they were not allowed to.

at the back of my mind, i knew what was happening and it angered me. we expressed this to one of the consulate's officers towards the end of the very short program. he said he didn't know anything about it and would get down to it when he goes back in.

i purposely stayed behind until the gate was re-opened. joining the big crowd of people in the lift, i asked them what happened inside. some told me that the consulate closed down the gate and didn't allow them to leave. this was because of the protest action happening outside, one said.

when i told them that i was one of the protesters, one of the migrant workers told me/us to be more considerate of their situation when we hold protests. the inconvenience "we caused" was just too much.

i told them that this has never happened in past picket protests we did in the consulate. i told them that this was beyond our hands and it was the consulate's call.

as soon as we reached the second level, i witnessed a long line of filipinos and chinese, all going to the 14th floor.

we told them of the situation upstairs as well as to why we were protesting.

when we talked of the abadilla 5 and the issue of human rights in the philippines, they apparently agreed. some of them even said that there was nothing wrong in protesting and it was natural and right for us to express ourselves.

-----

personally, i feel so angry and so ashamed of the consulate.

such an urgent concern was being expressed to them and this is how they responded. we talked of the reality of torture and repression in the philippines and this is what they did.

as if protesting was being used an excuse to inconvenience the migrant workers. such a policy, if it does exist, speaks so well of the present government's attitude towards dissent, criticism or even the simple right of speech or expression.

thinking out loud, i imagined that had this happened in the philippines, we would have been violently dispersed, some of us arrested for illegal assembly while the foreigners would be charged and immediately deported back to their own home countries, banned from entering the philippines for the rest of their lives.

the asian human rights commission, the one who initiated the action, got this for a response from the consulate. fr. robert reyes, in his first visit to the consulate, got this for a response as well.

the response they gave was more than just a cold shoulder.

call this exaggerating, but what they did, for me, was heinous.

walking down the memory road

speaking of love, naalala ko si rv, isang lalaking pangit mula sa manila. isang lalaking pangit na ewan ko ba kung bakit ko nagustuhan.



we met in several protest actions during the height of the anti-erap campaign. after bumagsak ng matandang huklubang babaero, korap at sugarol, mas lagi na kaming nagkikita sa Diliman, sa Mendiola, sa may Lourdes Pasig(nandun kasi ang CHED - Commission on Higher Education.) at sa kung saan-saan pa.

i decided to court him. made paper cutouts, wrote a poem, enjoyed every moment. he agreed to see me and even to the courtship itself.

he is straight by the way. he was and still probably is. that time, he told me/us he was sexually fluid and wouldn't mind getting along.

we did get along. until a few days after. for one whole month, hindi ko sya nakita, makita, o kung anu-anong kita. wala sa casaa. wala sa student council office. wala sa mga rali. kahit kontak sa phone, wala.

it was like walking on a ropeless hanging bridge in limbo except you don't know what you are walking on. i didn't know what i was walking on. i didn't know what was going on.

one day, i finally chanced upon him in vinzons and confronted him. i was nice and asked him to talk to me. he obliged.

he told me he never really had feelings. he just didn't know how to say it. he was afraid of hurting me.

i told him: no amount of buying time could stop a person from hurting. i will hurt still, whether he liked it or not. i will hurt eventually.

going home, alone, i was quiet. pagdating sa staffhouse, binuksan ko ang pc at nagsimulang gumawa ng press release para sa rali namin kinabukasan.

from somewhere, i heard cynthia alexander singing. and she was singing this:

walked the streets today mindless
of the way I argued with my feet
wanted to go this way but
went that way fate
had me in its grip
& by chance & grace both
I wonder
why I suddenly looked up
& in your deep, deep eyes
saw the Smile of all Smiles

in my naked wanderings I thought
I heard you whisper my name
there you are soft and slumbered
and cradled in her arms
well I try to understand why
you set me free
was it love or insecurity you let me be

I walk down the road, I
look up at the sky
now I know why
now I know why

reasoning has conquered me
I can't and won't deny the fact
my heart beats a special drummm
only for you
but I'm glad to be on my own
I have never been this free
from all suspicion and the pain
grown year upon year

give me
s p a c e
give me
t i m e
don't lose yourself
in a n y o n e

water rushes down my back down
the water runs walking in the rain
then seemed beyond conception
I've never been so alive
so much in love with life
and from the gray, gray sky
fell the Tear of all Tears

listening to it, i shed my own.

masarap maging bakla sa blog

masarap magbasa ng mga blog ng mga bakla.




baket?




kase wit na need to buy valentine romances. go fetch lang sa bloger (pronounced bloger, no stops.) ng mga bayers and there you go, a stream of words flowing like honey from the orii and ovii of them nymphettes.




makakarelate ka pa kasi bakla ka rin. tulad nila.

animal figures in japanese speech

this is one article i enjoyed reading - about animals figuring greatly in japanese conversations.




while the chinese have similar idioms and so do the english, albeit not as exciting (busy as a bee? duh!), conversing with a japanese in their native language might give the listener a feeling of being in a jungle or a forest with him/her unknowingly metamorphosizing into an animal.




i definitely liked the rabbit idiom. parang birds of the same feather, flock together, except mas dramatic, mas lyrical, mas exotic.





It's a dog's life when you wear a cat on your head
By KAORI SHOJI




Animals have always been prevalent in the Japanese language, perhaps more so than in other parts of the world, because Japanese people were for so long vegetarian, Buddhist or Shintoist.




Even now, upon seeing a kitsune (fox), a Japanese person is more likely to pray to it than hunt it down. Or think about asking it out for a date. Female allure is often attributed to kitsune powers, and there's many a Japanese folk tale about some poor guy entrapped by a woman's charms, only to discover later that he had been kitsune ni bakasareta (fooled by a fox) and the woman of his dreams had been hiding a shippo (tail) in her kimono.




The term megitsune (female fox) points to a sho-waru (bad or rotten in nature) femme fatale, who usually entices her male victims, betrays them and strips them bare. Still, it's believed that a man should run into a megitsune at least once in his life, if only to know the difference between destructive, animal allure and normal womanhood he can rely on in a wife/mother.




The few women that transcend humanity or animal attractiveness are usually compared to tsuru (cranes). The children's fable "Tsuru no Ongaeshi (The Gratitude of the Crane)" is about a lovely female crane who turns herself into a young woman to repay a hunter who once helped her. She marries him, cooks and cleans for him, and at night when he's sound asleep turns herself back into a crane to pluck the feathers from her body and weave a gorgeous cloth that he sells for a lot of money.




Interestingly, the animal terms for men are a lot less flattering. The less fairer sex is compared to a kuma (bear), if they're big and strong, a nezumi (mouse) if they're small-statured, or a hebi (snake) if they're abusive or stingy with money.




My grandmother tended to judge people by their animal year. She said that the best year for a man to be born in was tatsu (dragon) because of their dedication, loyalty and heaven-given grace.




The Japanese have also dispensed more than a fair share of cruelty on animals. Shamisen strings were made from cat gut, and to prove the authenticity of the wares, decapitated cat heads were displayed on shamisen shop fronts as recently as the 1960s. Whales were traditionally hunted and eaten, and sea turtles were killed for their shells. Taxidermy was a respected skill; in fact, stuffed animals are still a mark of status and wealth in many regions.




However, relations between men and animals in Japan have mostly been fairly amicable. After all, many people like to believe that the moon is inhabited by rabbits, making mochi (rice cake).




Before westernization set in, Japanese referred to animals as kemono (creatures with fur) and fish as uminomono (creatures of the sea). Both were considered to harbor strange, mystical powers that could be beneficial or harmful to humans depending on the circumstance.




Currently, Japanese is peppered with amusing animal jargon, some of it new and others very traditional. A good swimmer is still called kappa, after the mythical creature who supposedly lives in ponds, has flippers instead of feet and a small receptacle of water attached to its head. When this receptacle dries up, the kappa expires. An overweight or hefty person is often called todo (sea walrus). A person (mostly women) who acts cute and inoffensive, but is actually hiding a more diabolical nature, is called nekokaburi (has a cat on their head). Anyone with big eyes will have school memories of being taunted as a demekin (goldfish). A person with long legs is called kamoshika (gazelle).




The term saru (monkey) has a whole range of meanings, most of which are pretty obvious. The phrase saru no yo ni suru (do like a monkey) refers to a tendency for repetition and stupidity and has connotations that are often sexual. Other notable terms include inu-gui (eat like a dog) to describe someone with bad table manners; neko-manma (cat food) for the all-time Japanese classic meal of miso soup and rice eaten from the same bowl; and buta-nomi (pig drinking) for swilling drinks straight out of a bottle. But my personal favorite is usagi-taishitsu (rabbit disposition), which refers to a person who can't stand solitude and must huddle with other rabbits in a cramped little warren, in order to remain healthy and sane.




Use some of the above phrases and watch your popularity with your friends unagi-nobori (eel climb), or skyrocket.




i got this article in the japan times online, world's window to japan.




as for the picture, i was looking for a japanese lion in google images and this is what i got. it is called fondushi, a traditional japanese underwear, something i would love to land my hands on.

borderline

it soothes you. it keeps you. it is like singing it all over again. this time around with much more feelings.

while i like madonna's original version, this one i would play while:

a) having a wonderful dinner with a boyfriend inside his or my house. lit candles all over. us in just underwear.

b) walking along parklane in nathan road with a lover. holding hands. walking slowly.

c) reading banana's blog (http://bananachoked.blogspot.com/) where i struck gold with this find. thanks, b!

ladies and gentlemen, jody watley's rendition of borderline.

The Best Kiss of 2007

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby.

it was from this movie that will ferrell and sacha baron cohen won the best kiss in mtv movie awards 2007.

i haven't seen the film but it was truly very intriguing. after seeing the acceptance performance by the two, i was at a loss for words.

syeet. gusto ko ring makihalik........

si polo ravales at si grace jones

pictures can play tricks on someone's mind.

i one time saw a pic of polo ravales, except the photo was upside down. looking at him, i couldn't help but wonder if he is a descendant of black superstar, queen vampiress grace jones.

okay, she's black and he's a half-breed. but hey, gruenberg can be grace jones' middle name.

i have to prove it one time, at least, for the second time to myself.

paano manood ng ocean's 13 sa hong kong

kung mahilig ka talagang manood ng sine, at mayron ka namang atik, watch na.

dito sa hong kong, maraming mahilig manood ng sine kahit wala sila masyadong anda. pero nakakapanood pa rin sila kasi may mga cheap dates and cheaper times sa ilang mga piling sinehan na mapupuntahan nila.

cheap dates: usually tuesday o saturday yan.

cheaper times: 10AM ng umaga. o earlier.

ilang piling sinehan: sa may cinematheque sa yau ma tei o dun sa broadway sa may mongkok (sa may sai yeung choi street, kung saan mo makikita ang bossini, giordano concepts, esprit factory outlet, kfc at iba pa.)

pag sinabi kong mura, syempre hindi yon mura sa pinoy standards. nagcoconvert pa kasi ako non.

dati, mga 4 years ago, nakakapanood pa ako sa halagang 25HKD (if 6 is to 1, mga 150 pesos. not bad lalo na kung hindi naman talaga punuan at lahat ay nakakaupo.) a few months and years after, umabot na to sa mga 30HKD hanggang mga 40HKD. affordable pa rin naman.

dito sa ocean's 13 na pinanood ko kanina, 55HKD ang binayaran ko.

mahal ano? normally, 60-70HKD ang bawat panood. di ka pa makakaulit. sa ilang suking sinehan, hindi ka pa pwedeng magdala ng pagkain. tapos ang popcorn pa nila, ang tamis-tamis. tapos may mga sumasagot pa sa mga cellphones nila habang nanonood. ay, nagreklamo daw ba?

enough of the paysung. nilibre naman ako ng aking mga kaibigan kaya wala na akong panahon at karapatang magreklamo.

kubrick

so, naglakad kami papunta sa yau ma tei kung saan nakapagpabook na kami, hiwa-hiwalay nga lang. pumasok muna ako sa kubrick na katabi ng sinehan. maganda tong lugar na to kasi maraming foa* books and cds and everything artsy-fartsy.

dito mo rin makikita ang limpak limpak na kabaklaan kasi usually sila lang naman ang nag-aapreciate ng mga ganitong kabourgeoisahan. well, may ilang mga teeny-bopper girls na nakatanghod dun sa isang napakapangit na character na kinopya lang mula kay ikabod, except ginawa syang tao at batang babae. ang tsaka! kasama ng mga teeny-bopper girls ang kanilang simpapayat na mga boypren na walang ginawa kungdi ikalangkang ang kanilang mga kamay sa bewang o leeg ng kanilang mga girlfriend na either nakasuot ng polkadots, kukur o ilonah-jean-fashion attire.

lumabas agad ako kasi puro intsik karamihan ng mga books. at na-sight ko na ang lahat ng mga bakla sa loob. walang booking ngayon, sorry, manonood ako ng sine with my friends.

watching ocean's 13, pinoy style

dito sa loob ng sinehan ko narealize ang ilang cultural differences sa pagitan ng mga pinoy at tsekwang nakatira dito:

a) mahilig talaga tayong tumawa. ang mga tsekwa, hindi. i was ruling this one out at first pero i realized marami sa mga kasama kong chenes sa loob ng sinehan ay mga nag-iingglisan afterwards. so paanong hindi sila tumatawa at kami lang ng mga kaibigan kong noypi ang laughatolla kumeini?

natawa lang sila dun ke token chinese member of the 13, whatever.

b) ang mga pinoy comment ng comment sa sinehan, ang mga tsekwa deadma. me kasama akong umaayon kay matt while the latter was stating about this idea of his. asus, ang lolang pinaycchia, cheka ng cheka. while deadmang kunwa-chuva ang mga chenes, tingin pa rin sila ng tinggin kay pinaycchia. kulang na lang sabihin nya, TAMA KA LINUS! GO WITH THE IDEA!

at kahit pa literally she heeded my friend's advice to cover her mouth with her hands, comment pa rin sya ng comment. well, muffled nga lang!

c) and last, walang kumakain sa mga tsekwa sa loob ng sinehan. ang mga pinoy, LAPANG! yun lang.

maligaya ang pelikulang ocean's 13. light. nakakatawa. nakakatuwa. di mo na kinakailangang mag-isip. maligaya ring mag-obserba sa mga chenes habang nanonood sila. maligaya ring panoorin ang mga do's and don'ts nila sa screen na pagkacheapang talaga kasi ang mga graphics, manay, kepapanget! at lastly, maligaya akong uuwi matapos kong malaman ke pinaycchia na may bago ng papang artista - si rusty ryan.

menage-a-trois

it makes me wonder why i still went with it even if, as a rule, i don't go for it. i had sex this afternoon with two guys - one i know, the other a stranger.

the one i know introduced me to the stranger. the stranger asked me if i wanted to do it with him. i said, as courtesy, the three of us should do it. i felt it would be bad to leave behind the one i know just to get this load of my... chest. or down below it.

so we went and did it.

in the middle of the whole intercourse, i just felt so left out. the stranger wanted the one i know, edging me out figuratively from the bed. he wanted the one i know so much that he had to verbalize every little thing he had in his mind. whether it was the mind right inside his head or in that one below him, i didn't care. i felt left out.

sparing everyone, including myself, of the details that further made me feel so humiliated inside, it all, thank you dionysus, was finally finished. being transparent that i was, the stranger seemed to hint about how i felt. but sure did the one i know know it.

i was trying to divert the frustration by telling the one i know that the stranger seems to have the hots for him while the stranger was in the bath. if he, however, happened to have the same hots for the stranger, he sure got aces not letting me know it.

i left the hotel and went back to the office, where i am writing all these things down. i couldn't seem to focus on work because i just have a welling up of bad emotions, bad vibe.

i have never felt this bad. after dispersing so many times in the past of any possibility of rejection, i got, finally, rejected. i couldn't focus because i never thought i could feel it, that i could experience it. the rejection.

in a menage-a-troi, one will surely be left out in the course of the sexual engagement. like in adultery, it hurts for the other person when he finds out that his partner is doing it with someone else. much worse, if he was in it, in the bed with the two.

it would take a lot of conscious effort from all three engaging people to make sure that not one is left out. but one cannot expect that from either of the two, even if he was taking conscious effort himself. it would be utterly stupid to start demanding that everybody gets equal share of attention.

that just doesn't happen in real life. go get a movie if you believe it does so.

it came to me, after a few minutes of thinking. that i, having personified libido and the need to fulfill it every single time, need a partner. just one. and it can be a series of ones, not just altogether at the same time. one that at least i know who can...

share all my sexual passion and desires with.

share that that special moment where lust can be transformed into passion and hopefully, ultimately into love.

share that heat that rises up from the middle of my torso and out into my chest and straight to the extensions of my body. from my armpits to these arms to the very tips of my fingers. from these strong thighs and down to my calves and straight to my toes. from everything that protrudes out of me, including those perpetually-erect nipples i have.

eherm...

while this seems weird and i feel awkward having to finalize this with such a profound realization, i think that i just need to blurt it out.

i am an animal and i need to be filled. i am a person and i need to fulfill and be fulfilled.

not by two. not by three.

fuck the other guy. just one.

pinoy gay blogging and me

may 2007 titi awardee empress maruja. bryanboy fabuleaux whatever. lyka bergen and the gang of las tres estrellas. mandaya moore.

kabaklaan was the only and all that pushed me to start my own blog. my friend, gay blog reader and seasonal blog writer, introduced me to the lte through what i remember so fondly the most engaging entry i have ever read: sino ang susunod kay linda carter bilang wonder woman?

daaay, baklang bakla! i remember the gold wrist band sparkling in broad daylight, accompanying the whole entry. how can people discuss these matters in virtual public? i didn't feel it was shallow. neither did i feel it was stupid. i couldn't imagine it to be even pathetic!

it wasn't. it was sound. it would actually be what's running at the back of anyone's minds. it would be what gay people on and offline would really talk about. well, at least filipino gay people.

americans would talk about fashion and all fugs. norwegians would talk about fjords and body piercing. the british would talk about how ugly the women dress up in their country. but gay pinoys? gay pinoys would talk about VIRTUALLY anything!

so i decided to write and have my own blog. i realized how interesting people can concoct words into engaging phrases, sentences and paragraphs. parang hindi mo na kinakailangang magtapos ng creative writing sa UP Diliman para lang makapagsimula ng blog. and i thought to myself, maybe i can.

gay bloggers write what they want to write, what interests them, what doesn't interest them, whom they're interested with, those who they think are interested in them, anything interesting. keber na sa mga mambabasa (although at the back of anyone's head, we always would like to have a good, steady, if not a raucously tremendous following of readers.)

most gay bloggers can scream out loud, shriek with all great mascu-feminine intensity, dress fag and still be proud. there is no fear of being judged and ostracized. unless namukhaan ka ng tatay mo sa blog mo.... (aaay, bakla si papa?)

now if one is hit or hurt, it is all virtual.

however, we gays, on or offline, have a way of joining together and collectively hit on that attacker. kahit pa virtual ang atake, aatak pa rin ang mga bakla!

kaya i don't feel scared. people have the right to express themselves. now if we do wrong, then we right it. and possibly even re-write it.


i'll write my next entry next month.




babasahin ko muna ang lahat ng nasa gay blogging community!

utada hikaru

probably the youngest to be in japan's top-ranked artists, she was launched into stardom with this song played and topping the hits in 1999.

she married a photographer and artist 15 years her junior, someone who has directed many of his music videos.

i only knew about her through this song which i only heard two years ago.

she sings well. mahal ko na sya.

and good thing for this mtv that has the romanized japanese lyrics with a corresponding english translation.

baka mawala pa sa youtube. inembed ko na dito.

enjoy!!!

Remembering Tiananmen

The whole sight at Causeway Bay reminded me of floating candles and flowers along the rivers of Thailand. It reminded me of giant fireflies in the dark areas of the Sierra Madre at night. It reminded me of stars I gazed at for hours in Vienna.

The sight of more than 5,000 people in Victoria Park holding candles in a surprisingly cool spring night while commemorating the 18th year of the Tiananmen Square massacre in China was engulfing.

They braved the heat from all fronts and endured the sweat that flowed profusely in every part of their bodies. They didn't mind the darkness.

They did mind the darkness actually. The darkness that unfolded right before their very eyes when government authorities tried to whitewash the whole incident. When the government tried to say that it never happened. That it was never a crackdown. That foreign documentaries made about it were all false.

They did mind the darkness that's why they lit the candles. And every candle they lit was a search towards the truth. It was shedding light on the truth. It was telling what truly happened and what need to be done.

Last night, I felt closer to the truth. And closer I got to it I felt the need to break away from the petty qualms I have of life. Petty qualms I could have easily disposed of long time ago.

Petty qualms that the mothers of the many victims in the Tiananmen Square Massacare don't have now. Petty qualms they possibly have done away with as their children and loves ones did 18 years ago. Petty qualms that the government possibly has right now with the growing awareness of people on a murderous past it repeatedly covered and hidden.

The truth has come out. There is no way one can cover it.

male rest room etiquette

This is hilarious. While there is no universal truth to it, I see myself doing the same thing as many of those Sims men. Hahaha.

What are your thoughts on this matter? Is it really true? Paano kaya sa mga bakla? Iba, i am so sure, iba ang tinginan ng mga hitad pag nagkatinginan sa loob ng toilet na me libreng cubicle sa dulo...

Except I guess in the Philippines. And Nepal. Public toilets are either non-existent or just plain unnegotiably unlivable!