Ang Vakluzh Bilang Watashi in the New Generation

Ano itey, Coca Cola commercial?
Wit mga manash. At wit magiging Lilet ang A.bba.
Nagmodang makata lamang, tulad ni Benildang lola:
Napa-emote kay Pablo Neruda, ininspire ni Madonna.

Reinvention ba ang datetz? Parang Relentless ng Coke:
Panglinis ng latrine, naging energy drink?
Deadma na ditetz, ITEZ ang yearender kez
But before that, suba muna at wash na ng fez.

Andy Warhol ma’y colorful pa rin ang vivir
Coz of the chosen path na in the past ay di naisip makarir.
New lands, new men, new life, new hope.
Full English ba talaga? Full English talaga.

Waz nang walkaroo sa diksyonaryo at mapa
Ng mga bansang binisita, mga otokong di man lamang naikama
Ang mga nagbenefit, deadma na, mga bruha
Nawritesung na zilang en toto ng dinggang bloggera.

Ginetlak ang suyod at naging interesante
Naggugo, naglangis at si Abba’y umabante
At vilang respeto sa mga dyosang pinakinggan ng diche
Naglagay ng period bago sa unang Be.

At katulad ng Godivang naging tsokolate
Hinubad kez ang kapa at nagpakatotoo ‘te.
Ang l’importante, c'est la rose: Ang lezzons, walang echos.
Le bête is the new belle – ito ang aking propose.

Pagkat ang baklang itez ang dami nang nachenes:

Tumambling. Nazhafa. Nafatihaya.
Natanga. nalukras. Uber na nafahiya.
Umivig. Umispluk. Krumayola ng evergreen.
Nagpoz man sa testing, nagpose ala Miriam pa rin.

Ang mga bruises sa arms, legs, fez ng baklita
Loved like kalyo sa hands ng nategras na mudra.
It makes you real, makes you feel: mala-working hands baga?
Kazi naman ang metrosexual is so luma na zhulaga.

So fano maging bayot sa bagong fanahon?

Wit mashokot – umibig, umispluk, mag-explore, malungkot.
Handang umariba – sa kultura, teknolohiya, debate ng ideya.
Tanggapin ang failures – sa love, lust, looks or lots.
Pero wiz magpafigil, overflowing dafat ang guts.

Mahalin si ate kahit pa zha lezbyana.
At para ke fafa, iteach ang pitfalls ng patriyarkiya.
Marami mang mhin, wag kalimutan ang aking vilin.
Monogamy is best: if di makayey, zhondom ay zhuutin.

Nachugs na si Maria, pinalitan ni Gabriela
Ilaydown ang hairla, kahit wang manicure na fuschia
Progressive dafat, ateng. Waz na tayey sa ice age.
Atin nang tegrazin ang chenes niteng ating cage.

Odeva, Winnie Cordero ang mazhumaan ng Zun?
Out here in the open, it is so much fun!
Curtains up na mga bakla sa makavagong lavanan
End na ang zhunahon na feeling-feeling john.

--------
Sinampal ako ng bakla kong friendsung kaninang umaga. Hindi nya raw maintindihan ang baklang poem. Sabi ko, leche, kaya nga gayspeak yan para tayeng mga bayut lang ang makaknowles.

Pero di raw nya magets. 21 years old sya. Leche, di pa sya pinapanganak nang naging star sina Lilet at Kuh Ledesma. At para sa mga bulilitchinang nagdadalaga, some references:

1. New Generation ang moda ng Coca Cola noong 1987 habang naglalabasan ang mga bata at kumakanta ng "I am the future of the world" sa isang commercial. Si Lilet, isang starlet ng That's Entertainment ang kumanta from Pinas with kids from the rest of the world.

2. Benilda is Benilda Santos, isang napakahusay na makata na nakilala ko sa DLSU. Isa syang dekana ngayon sa ADMU.

3. Ang sinasabing pwedeng panglinis ng kubeta, ang Coke, ay may bagong energy drink: Relentless. HK$29.00 dito sa HK.

4. Andy Warhol - walang anda. Gawd, this is so 70s.

5. Walkaroo - walk

6. Otoko - mhin, kelot, lalake, taong may tite (although wit sa she-male. charot!)

7. Diyosa referred to as the people listened to by my diche are ABBA.

8. Diche is second oldest sister in Chinese. Eh bakla ang panganay na zhufatid na otoko. For dat!

9. C'est La Rose ay isang awiting French na kinanta ni Kuh Ledesma sa kanyang 1980 album entitled "Kuh". Tinagalog ang song-la at syang tinawag na "Bulaklak".

10. Le bête is the new belle - The beast is the new beauty.

11. Miriam is Miriam Quiambao. I'm sure knows mo na itez.

12. John is not John John. John is an American chuva for toilet bowl. Parang latrine in Latin.

Blah-blahs on Casual Sex

Have you ever experienced having that bad taste lingering in your mouth for what seemed like days when it has only been a few hours THAT you would actually go to great lengths like running for 30 minutes straight, taking a very hot shower with Dettol and drinking liters of water with salt just to rid yourself of it?

I had it tonight. And I think I still do.

Just a few hours ago, I met an exceptionally good-looking and very well-endowed man from the block. And we did it.

Apparently, the man was just in it for the sex and basked in the joy of being served. He didn't talk at all. He didn't move even. He just let me do my thing. I would have seen that coming but I didn't complain.

I hear myself saying this again - not complaining. It bothers me this time.

The Stupidity of Casual Sex, The Stupidity of Me in Casual Sex

It bothers me because I experienced the same feeling of unexplained bad taste like the very first time I did it. The guy did not talk either but was game in every way that he was.

Once he unloaded, he wiped himself clean with Tempo, zipped up and left.

And around the same time, the same empty. The same bad taste.

Casual sex they say is very good because once the denouement of sheer sexual climax is reached, the two are left with other more vital issues to discuss: like compatibility, stances on endless topics, whats and what-nots in a relationship, and other crucials as favorite color, most favored day of the week and what the other feels aside from the concerns of today's weather.

But one can only take so much casual sex. As some women would sacrifice their dignity into kissing as many frogs just to find the prince, some of our kin would lose out more than just dignity to fuck toads, lizards and dinosaurs in sheer number far bigger than what a Google search can ever be imagined possible.

I think I have reached that certain threshold where I cannot take any more alien intrusions in my mouth just so I would feel and identify the possibilities of familiarizing myself with the owner whom I have permitted to intrude my private space.

While I agree that sex is important to determine the first level of compatibility, I have whacked the stupid helmet in my head FINALLY this time to realize that I can never find that in just any other sexual encounter.

Beyond Contextualizing

I will not anymore delve into that craving of almost every homosexual male to be loved, praised and be considered an equal by the man he has dreamed of having beside him for the rest of his life.

I will not anymore try to discuss the great distance many of us would have to tread, with bare feet and blistered toes, holed pockets and emptied wallets, as we search for that man. While a few had the financial benefit of accumulating and throwing the unnecessary, a denizen of others find joy in scruffing for portions or recycles. Some have allegedly found gold in rubbish bins.

It is more of an attitude, not for others but for myself, that has got to change as I step out of the bin that I felt I was just in.

Casual sex is a more complicated type of trial and error. Either one hits or misses, EXCEPT: that one may find a hit, but the other may frown at the sight of a miss. No pun intended.

It is like short cutting one's way to the office when there is just so much joy in walking. You see friends, you meet unfamiliar faces, you actually stop at the nearest cafe to have a sip, and what do you know, that man in the counter has actually the same interests as you do. And he has that great smile. And a perfect set of teeth. But instead, you choose to sip the coffee he served you and talk some more rather than running swiftly into the public toilet and have an after-breakfast snack.

There are men these days who actually have interests other than sex. And they actually exist. And isn't that pleasantly surprising?

Maybe I should open a coffee shop. Naah. I think I would have to take slow walks this time.

And slower sips of coffee.

Holiday Wheezing

It has been days since I last posted. Usual comment that I have read in many blogs.

It must be the holiday rush. It must be work that comes up at the last minute. It must be the endless array of Christmas parties that everybody had to attend on a nightly basis that got them wondering what to wear the whole day.

Me, it is work. And being alone. With work.

But I don't mind. And I am not at all complaining. Believe me.

Adbentyur

Nepal was great and Spain is coming up roses now that the Spanish government has me in their list of YOUNG attendees in the upcoming Madrid Forum on the Alliance of Civilizations.

I fixed everything that has to be submitted to the Spanish Consulate, who luckily had an insulares working with them for the longest time. I printed all invitations, looked up my age-old passport photo and queued up in HSBC for a bank endorsement.

In Two Pacific Place, where they presently cocoon, the lifts were horrendously advanced that I had to key in 20 to bring me to the 20th floor. Of course, I only knew about keying in the number when I was in the 17th floor. And I had to go out of the lift (once again) to encode my desired floor. (Technology never fails to amaze, and sometimes frustrate, me.)

Upon reaching the 20th floor, I scouted 2017 only to find out they're closed for the holidays. Oo nga pala, these people celebrate Christmas.

Bikolano

Apparently, not only most of my beloved bloggers are UST-based, many of them are also Bikolanos.

Like Reyna Elena, Pinoy Blog Superstar for December 2007 in Empress Maruja's ultra-famous search.

I instantly liked the queen while reading through his comments and then his blog posts. Pretty entertaining and yet sensible for someone whose age I would not want to guess. It is not the age that matters, anyhow. It is what you say. ;-)

The reyna is now in Philadelphia, not attempting to be Andrew Beckett but someone more bodacious. The logo you see in my blog came from his blog, that is just like a mansion of precious things except you can touch them all and play with them.

And Reyna Elena can command his readers like Queen Elizabeth can command the winds. One time, I emailed people up about a hopefully-great something and he replied back with a forward to all his lot, staff and concubine. And by god, were the responses prolific!

Oragon talaga ang reyna.

Bakla

Michael Ball, pasok:
My gay friend who is recently into musicals downloaded Michael Ball and had me listening to him who played and is still playing Marius as part of Les Miserable's original cast.

While we lulled ourselves with the man's emotionally powerful voice, I thought out loud: the only most wonderful talent that God ever gave me was being gay.

And that friend uttered: You're so Broken Hearts Club - reminding me one of its most unforgettable lines: "I am already 28 years old and the only thing I am very good at is being gay."

I am already 33.

Aktibista

I missed out on several Christmas parties of migrant workers yesterday, Sunday. Reason: I decided to attend a forum on the challenges faced by the local social movement in Hong Kong in City University, the school where one has to go through a huge department store before entering it.

With the whole lot speaking in Cantonese, I scrimped on very good translation from a friend. And from what I discern, they are faced with the big challenge on how to move forward. Well, I put the word "move forward" when what they mostly did was discuss the past without really delving much on what its lessons were, how they would learn from these lessons, and how they can advance together.

I did not really budge. I expressed my solidarity and the optimism that comes with it.

I told this to a friend and he said: what they need is a revolution. I told him, no.

They need a good-looking man in the movement. At the minimum.

THE HAPPIEST OF HOLIDAYS AND A
BETTER, MORE FEISTY 2008 TO EVERYONE!

Lakbayang A.bba

Nakita ko to sa blog ni Lad (na meron talagang advertisement) at nainteresante ako kung kaya't ginawa ko.

My Lakbayan grade is B!

How much of the Philippines have you visited? Find out at Lakbayan!

Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii've been to paradise but I've never been. To. Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Asian English

In an international youth gathering in Beijing, there was one German bitch who commented on us Asians: "Why are Asians so slow? How long does it take for you to process everything we talk about?"

Sinagot ko ang hitad: "You're dense. Think about sitting in a room of people who do not speak English. Go back to school and study cultural sensitivity."

Sa matagal na panahon, laging pinipilit ng mga nanay at tatay natin, lalo na ang mga hitad sa gubyerno, na mag-aral ng Inggles. Para sa ating ikauunlad daw. Para sa mas magaganda, mas mapepera at mas promising na trabaho. Para sa isang maaliwalas na tomorrow.

Charot! Sabihin yan sa lahat ng mga nagtatrabaho sa mga call centers upang paghusayin ang pronunciation at enunciation of the English words para lamang kumita ng malaki. Call center jobs and writing medical transcriptions - me patutunguhan ba ang mga trabahong ito?!

For that (dahil major chika ang employment for the yut ditrez), sa isang gathering ng mga zhuvataan sa Nepal, aming ipinalaganap at ipinagmalaki ang paggamit ng Asian English.

Ano ang Asian English? Ito ang paggamit ng Inggles sa pinakasimple, almost Barok na pamamaraan upang magkaintindihan. Bigyan ng example:

"I would like to... I would like to... I would like to invite (pangalan) to sit as a guest in his seat." (Nakaupo na si kuya sa upuan nya. Pinapatayo para umupong muli.)

"Ladies and gentlemen, and friend, the renounced political leader of Nepal. Let us give him big clapping!"

Referring to political leaders gathering near our venue, one Nepali guy said: "This is the Nepal Subhamana Party." Ask ng isang international delegate, "Is that english for Christmas Party?"

"Please sit in my backside."

Sagot ng participant sa kung ano ang lalafangin nya: "Pig? No. Cow? No. Chicken okay!"

"I will try to speak as concisely, as clearly and as suckingly as possible."

"Are you very boring? If you are boring, I will be very lonely."

Pinagtatawanan namin ang mga sarili naming Inggles. But we all tried to understanding each other. In the end, nagtagumpay ang youth camp at lumanding pa sa sandamakmak na media ang kaganapang itez.

Sa evaluation namin, mas mahalaga kung ano ang gusto mong sabihin kaysa sa paano mo sya sasabihin. In the first place, sadyang diverse ever ang kultura at buhay ng mga Asyano. Natututunan lang natin ang lenggwaheng Western depende sa kung sino ang shumokop (colonize, bakla!) sa atez: Dutch for Indonesians, Spanish and English sa atin, French sa ilang Pacific Islands, etchos etchos etchos.

Other than that, isang palengke ng lenggwahe't kultura ang masasayla mo sa isang kumperensya ng mga zhubataang galing sa iba't ibang sulok ng Eyzha. So hot, so nakakaloka, so challenging! Yet so winner!

I sad I left Nepal. But very happy. For that, wang goodbye. See you later lang.


*******************************
At dahil nagpramis ako sa isang bakla re mga papang nakita kez sa Himalayaz, itez na zila:

For more animosity (anonymity ang mean ng isang participant), wa ng namesung ang mga yan. Basta ang age range: 19-25.

Danyabat!

Two to Tango

Thanks to Rye, I have this tag to enjoy while in the company of work and Nepali men.

1. Two names I go by: Rey (real life), Kiks (blog life)
2. Two things I am wearing right now: Streax darkest brown hair color, boots
3. Two things I have in a relationship: family, friends (ito ba yon?)
4. Two things I like to do: listening to music, arguing
5. Two things I want very badly in this moment: corned beef na may maraming patatas, pandesal
6. Two things I did last night: drink beer with a Malaysian friend, contend with bureaucracy
7. Two things I ate today: omelette on bread, tea granules from masala tea (yum!)
8. Two persons I last spoke to: travel writer John Krich, activist Dave Gilbert
9. Two things I am going to do tomorrow: remain beautiful and graceful amidst pressure, leave for Dhulikhel
10. Two favorite days of the week: Today and Tomorrow (ay, vague?!)
11. Two favorite holidays: Christmas, Good Friday (pinakamasayang araw kasi reunion)
12. Two favorite beverages: Lassi, Gulaman
13. Two things about me that you may not have known: Mahilig ako sa matatamis, Sinabi ko sa isang retreat that I only have 7 months to live (tapos naloka sila nung nagresurrect ako sa start of class)
14. Two jobs that I have had in my life: journalist-trainer, layout artist
15. Two movies I would watch over and over: The Devil Wears Prada (especially the first 5 minutes), Little Mermaid (Ariel should be 33 years old by now)
16. Two places I have lived (outside my parents home): Corotan Mansions in Quezon City (very good bonding), White House in Hong Kong
17. Two of my favorite food: tosino, santan (Bicolano coco jam with pili nuts)
18. Two places I would rather be right now: Hong Kong, Canada (with family and Big Guy)

And here is another question: What are the 5 gifts you would buy for yourself this christmas, if you had unlimited income?
1. everything Lucio Tan owns (University of the East, Centennial Airport, Philippine Airlines) and Lucio Tan himself
2. since Rye has MTR, I will have Chek Lap Kok (para me gay park na mailagay!)
3. World Bank

I tag Chase the Queer Chef and KC, the kalansay collector.

Magimbal sa Nepal!

Correct me if I'm not wrong (sabi nga ng aking Malaysian friend) pero sadyang habang tumatagal ang aking pananatili dito, lalong nagbabago ang pagtingin ko sa Nepal.

True enough, like Malate is not Manila, neither is Thamel Nepal. Marami kang katutuwaan at sobrang ikamamahal sa Nepal, lalo na't malalaman mong marami kayong things in common. You just might say at some point: So Filipino, So Asian.

O, tama na ang emote.

Inside Thamel

Tindahang sandamakmak ang makikita mo sa kalakhan ng Thamel. Thamel, which comes from two words "mela" which means marketplace and "Tha" which is the name of the place, ay parang isang malaking Divisoria na iminerge sa Malate.

Kahit may isang rumored gay disco bar, marami ring cafes, bars, restos at hotels na matatagpuan sa loob ng Thamel. Dito mo makikita ang kalakhan ng mga turista. Except me!

At kung mawawala ka, looksee mo palagi ang mga temples sa halos bawat corner ng Thamel (and beyond). At hwag masha-shock sa maraming mga kelot na naghoholding hands, natural sa kanila yon.

Nepal Chuva

Food, clothing, music, arts. Maraming bagay sa Nepal na lubos mong katutuwaan. Parang Thailand, ang gaganda ng kanilang mga quilts at wall cloth covers.

Ang fudams, winner din from desserts to main dishes like tarkari, biryani, alu paratha, et cetera. Think Mister Kabab in Quezon City (saan nga ulit iyon?), you will see that Nepali food is never different. It is a sweeter and less maanghang version of Indian food.

At kung tela, go-lah na. The picture on the right is the shop of my friend Usa. Winner ang pashmina, ang yak fur and everything. Wag kang bibili ng sapatos unless marunong kang tumingin. Mura ang scarves bilang mga pasalubong.

Hindi nga lang magaganda ang mga ref magnets nila.

Kathmandu vs. Manila

May mga sari-sari stores din sila. May tingi rin silang yosi. Nakasakay nga lang sa kabayo ang mga pulis nila (at hindi malalaki ang tyan!)

Noong nawala ako at kokonti lang ang rupee datung (1HK$ = 7NR), bumili ako kay Ate (see woman holding something white) ng popcorn. Oks lang naman si Ate nung kunan ko ng pic. Pagtalikod ni Ate, ay me batang karga ang lola.

Naloka ako!

Nepal Friends

May mga gwapo din naman talaga sa Nepal, katulad ni Sud. Maghahanap ka nga lang kung yon ang pakay mo sa Nepal.

Si Usa ang may-ari ng tindahang binilhan ko ng aking pashmina bonnet.

At yan si Rabi, ang Nepaling may wide smile. Too wide at some point akala ko isa syang puppet. Pero kaibigan ko sya. Pero kakaiba talaga ang tawa nya. Hahahaha.


Marami pang bagay na dapat ikwento pero mauubos na ang load ko. Danyabat!

Namas-tse!

Kung vovoto ako sa best place to get lost in NatGeo Get Lost chorva, it would have to be NEPAL!

And wid that, ang travel advisory para sa lahat ng mga bayot going to the Himalayas:

Walk

Mas win ang walk kesa ride, unless rickshaw ang moda mo. Kahit saan, kahit kailan, even in major thoroughfares at 12MN, walk ang mga utraz. Deadma sa mga speeding sasakyan and everything. Dito, mafi-feel mong ikaw ang Miss World of the Road and not any other vehicular drivers.

Map

Mapa? Gudlak! Go-lah akez sa hotel manager asking for a Kathmandu map. Ginibsung ako ng isang mapa - with a blank outline of the whole valley with a star in the middle and the only English word that reads... Guess.... kurak, KATHMANDU.

Internet

At kung ang trabaho mo ay isang inborn asthma at internet ang ventoline mo, mag-deep breathing ka pag lumapag sa land-locked country na itez. I can hear Miranda Priestley mouthing from behind: By all means move at a glacial pace. You know how that thrills me.

For that, wag dalhin ang trabaho sa Nepal (unlike poor me.)

Food

After mag-rant, lumafang. Win ang food, lalo na ang desserts. Maraming choices. Maging maligaya.

Camaraderie

And for more, look up Blue Diamond Society, ang kaisa-isang gay group ditez sa Nepal.

For them, gay ang tawag sa mga paminta, transgender sa mga effem, at transgendered sa mga successful transplants.

At sa usaping talent portion, magstanding ovation ka na lang mala-Ellen Degeneres even with a bad back.

Marami raw lgbt groups dito. Pero sila ang pinakalove ko.

Sex

Kung sex ang habol mo, bring a partner or a friend.

Searching sex partners online can be frustrating: 3 lang ang matatagpuan sa www.guys4men.com, puti pa yung isa; zilch naman sa www.dudesnude.com; at sa friendster, di ko alam - puro question marks lang kasi ang lumalabas sa buong site ditey.

And no, walang gay sauna sa Nepal.

Lastly

Best place ang Nepal to relax and be an adventure gay princess, a la Himalayan goddes chuva. Sey nga ng isang travel website, the Nepali skies in December are as clear as Swarovski crystals.

I'm sure bakla ang may-ari nitez.


Update: Napadaan ako sa entrance ng Thamel at nakakita ako ng mga mapa. Pumasok ako sa Thamel at napakabilis ng internet. Sinusulat ko to habang gamit ang PC ng isang kaibigan sa labas ng Thamel. Mabagal kaya inabot ng 30mins para makapaglog-on. Minamadali ko na kasi in 15mins daw ay mawawalan na ng kuryente. In Nepali terms, that means 2 minutes. Me sariling mundo marahil ang Thamel. Gudbay!

Kristo

Hindi ako relihiyoso pero ang kristong alam ko hindi nakatira sa magagarbong simbahang kailangan pang pigain mula sa mga nananampalataya ang pagpapaganda. Hindi rin ako naniniwala sa kristong ginawang compulsory fashion ang panyo, payong at iba pang mga bagay-bagay na ibinebenta tuwing may pagsamba. Lalong hindi ako naniniwala sa kristong hindi makikialam sa pulitika.

Ito ang kristong pinaniniwalaan ko:



May artista kayang pwedeng gumawa naman ng obrang kasama nya ang mga bayot sa parlor, sa palengke at sa farm?

Para kay Aida

It was Paul Jabara they attributed the red ribbon to. Paul Jabara who made the greatest and gayest songs (three of which are featured here) and musicals ever.

For that, this post goes out to him and all those beautiful people who made gay life so gay. And meaningful.

Let's enjoy life. Let's enjoy love. Let's enjoy the struggle.

The Main Event

Last Dance

It's Raining Men

The struggle against discrimination and ostracism is serious enough. Magseseryoso pa ba ng husto?!!